Thursday, June 01, 2006

in the zone

I've never been so...great.

Not happy.

Not perfect.

Just...right.

I don't even mean it just in terms of how I feel. I mean, mostly it's a feeling, but it's more than that. It's a rightness with the world...with me.

I've been saying recently that the goal of life isn't happiness, it's fulfillment. Happiness comes and goes, and it's great while it lasts, but it never does last. That's why I don't want to rely on feelings - feelings are fleeting. But this feeling, this sense...it lasts. And it has lasted. And it goes deep. It's awesome.

I can only describe it as like being in the zone.

I'm in the zone. Like I'm right where God wants me to be. Or maybe like I'm acknowledging that where I am is where God wants me to be. Not a God-imposed place...just a God-intended place. A me-living-me place. Or maybe I'm just where I am, and finally ok with that.

And now I'm looking forward to a break. A well-deserved break. A chance to reflect on where I am. Where I've come from. Where I'm going. Expand my now, as Owen says. Hooray for large, even enormous, nows.

I am ready
I am ready
I am ready
I am...fine
I am...fine
I am fine.

2 comments:

Chris said...

You've been pulled out from inside. Great news. Enjoy your break and have fun chasing the ducks!

Alicia said...

this is all because you met me right? This often happens to people after they meet me.